Sunday, October 30, 2005

Aliens are reading my blog !

Yes, I got prove.

Provided if they got ISP (Internet Service Provider), and they got WIFI technology, because you don't see a copper phone line connecting Earth and Mars right ? So they need WIFI, then tap into any coffee bean/starbucks, type in the CORRECT URL (If, they still have fingers after their latest evolution) and "Ta da ~" my blog.

So what if the Alien like my blog and decided to see me in person? By tracking the IP most probably they'll know where am I. They'll prefer abducting me coz that's what they are good at, according to some earthling’s documentary movie (The X Files). So what should I do?

"The Blog in Space team has received a number of inquiries this month on generally practiced contact protocol. While Blog in Space offers no "official" rules per say, we endorse the following steps.

1) If they ask to be taken to your leader, contact the White House immediately. If you can't get through to the President, ask for the Vice President and follow the line of succession from there.

2) Practice Active listening. Taking an interest in what the extraterrestrials are saying builds trust and provides foundation for future contact.

3) Strike a common bond. For instance, you might ask if he/she/it has an active interest in stamp collecting or wiffle ball.

4) Don't come on too strong. Nothing is more unattractive to alien life forms than a needy Earthling.

5) It's okay not to comment. While the Blog In Space team is pro-alien (and always will be), it would be ignorant to assume there aren't a few bad apples in the universe. If you are questioned about Earth's solar defenses or nuclear technology, we recommend you change the subject. "

Does it make sense to you? Let us analyse the protocol.

*1) Huh ? Contact the white house? I don't even have Ah Bush or Ah Dick's number, Dato' Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi's contact I also dun't have, may be I'll show them UMNO building. What the heck, I'll just bring them home to my dad, coz he's da boss!!!

*2) And where could I learn how to speak Alien language? On Earth? If I speak Alien or they speak mandarin/english/bm/hokkien/cantonese, looks like they have more choices.

*3) Hehe... this one I know, you see the BIG ROUND SHINNING eyes they have? That's is meant for checking out leng loois (SYT or Pretty Girls)... I'll bring them clubbing, Japanese car show, strip dance, nude beach ...... sure can strike some bond.

*4) Ok, no problem, I'll play ignorant, plus some teasing and flirting.

*5) "YOU BLODDY BIG HEAD F**KING GREEN BEANS, YOUR FREAKING EYES LOOK LIKE POLISHED MERCEDES CLK HEAD LIGHTS....." Yes, I think it's better not to say anything, even you are a truthful person. Honesty is not the best policy in this case. Anyone here know about nuclear technology? What?! You dunno? Go get a James Bond Movie TODAY! So DON"T TELL THE ALIENS ABOUT JAMES BOND MOVIES! May be Mission Impossible too...

However one thing puzzled me here, why can't we tell them the Solar Defense thingy? It's common sense, you no need a PHD/Secret Government Project/Genius to understand how it works, even the toilet cleaning Ah Soh with primary education know how to operate the system WITHOUT ANY TRAINING! Some more they can get it anywhere, it's a retail product, even online.

The Solar Defense System comes with different brand too :) They also got ULTRA series Defense system, Solar Defense Booster, as well as FULL SPECTRUM Defense System.

Wanna extend your readers coverage to other than human? You can have your blog send to space here.

*Some info : If you think Alien don't read blogs, I think you are Alien. Anyone ever been to US will know that humanoid whom is not an US citizen will be termed as ALIEN ! So you are US Citizen a not? Else you are ALIEN ~ AND YOU ARE READING MY BLOG !*


Post a Comment

<< Home